The good news is that Kitai is feeling better.
Let me back up.
Monday I decided not to pursue treatment and instead am opting for palliative care for Kitai. This means we'll do our best to manage his discomfort but won't use chemo or radiation to stop his illness. It was a hard decision to make but in my gut I feel it's the right one. Quite a few friends messaged me to let me know they tried aggressive treatments to save their dogs when they received similarly devastating diagnosis' and each one told me they regretted pursuing treatment. The small gain in time simply wasn't worth the additional stress and suffering their pets endured to receive the treatment.
At the Vet's office
Also on our last visit Kitai was terrified the moment we entered the vet's waiting room. It was odd because he's never been frightened there before. He hid beneath the blue bench in the waiting room, cowering down and peering out. When it was our turn he wouldn't walk into the exam room. I had to pick him up and carry him in. Once there he scrambled like crazy to leap off the exam table. He was completely traumatized and nothing had happened to him yet. That fear is another reason I am not pursuing treatment. Not only would the chemo make him not feel well, the trauma of even having to be in the office is stress I'm simply not willing to put him through.
Because of this I canceled today's oncology appointment and instead found a mobile vet who will come to The Glampette when the time comes. That way he can be where he is most happy and comfortable as he leaves this world. I would never forgive myself if his last experience was one of fear and trauma.
I also found a local veterinary office where I can take his body to be cremated. It felt really morbid to make plans like this while he's still alive but I know it's better to do it now than later, having to scramble at the last minute when I won't want to waste a minute trying to help and comfort Kitai.
For now he's on Prednisone (a steroid) which will help to reduce the swelling in his lymph nodes. Because the Prednisone can upset his stomach he's also on Pepcid. After three doses I did notice the nodes under his front legs have shrunk a bit. Hoping and praying the decline continues as it means he'll have more time and be more comfortable during the time he has left.
Thank you to everyone for your thoughts, prayers, good energy, and love. It's meant the world to me and instead of feeling like I'm sinking into a pit of despair I've felt uplifted and surrounded by light instead. Right now the sun is shining out the door of The Glampette and Kitai is curled up on the other side of me taking a nap. It's a perfect moment and I'm enjoying every second of it.
Updates on Kitai's Condition:
What was left of my heart is being put to the test - February 10, 2014
Kitai Update: Lymphoma and Prednisone - February 13, 2014
True Love: A girl and her dog - February 21, 2014
Kitai Update: Looking for signs - February 26, 2014
Kitai Update: Hanging in there - March 9, 2014
Kitai is almost out of time - March 17, 2014
A once in a lifetime dog. . . RIP Kitai - March 19, 2014
It's been four weeks since you left me - April 15, 2014